Many people spend their lives waiting to be happy. You may think, “if only I had more money,” or “could lose weight,” or (you fill in the blank), then I would be happy. Well here is a secret: You can be happy right now. It’s not always easy, but you can choose to be happy, and in the vast majority of circumstances there is no one who can stop you except yourself. The truth is, happiness doesn’t come from wealth, perfect looks, or even a perfect relationship. Happiness comes from within. This is why if you truly want to be happy, you need to work on yourself first.
What is the secret to being happy? You can learn how to do it, just as you can learn any other skill. Those who are happy tend to follow a certain set of habits that create peace of mind in their lives. This article compiles twenty-four such behaviors that you can use to enhance your life and happiness.
1. Let Go of Grudges
Forgiving and forgetting is necessary for your own happiness, as holding a grudge means you are also holding onto resentment, anger, hurt and other negative emotions that are standing in the way of your own happiness. Letting go of grudges frees you from negativity and allows more space for positive emotions to fill in.
2. Speak Well of Others
It may be tempting to gather around the office water cooler to get and give the daily gossip, but talking negatively about others is like taking a bath in negative emotions—your mind and body soak them up. Instead, make it a point to only say positive, constructive words about people, and you’ll help foster more positive thinking in your own life as well.
3. Treat Everyone with Kindness
Kindness is not only contagious, it’s also proven to make you happier. When you are kind to others, your brain produces feel-good hormones and neurotransmitters like serotonin and you are able to build strong relationships with others, nurturing positive feelings all around.
4. Regard Your Problems as Challenges
Change your internal dialog so that anytime you have a “problem” you view it as a challenge or a new opportunity to change your life for the better. Eliminate the word “problem” from your mind entirely.
5. Don’t Be Envious
Many people are unhappy because others have more material possessions or achievements. The great spiritual leaders teach that nothing happens by chance or accident, and whatever you have you or don’t have, you created it with your own thoughts and beliefs, even though your conscious mind isn’t aware of doing it. So be satisfied with what you have. And if you are not satisfied, then strive to be your best. Use positive, creative thoughts and actions to bring about the change you would like to see. And regardless of circumstances, learn to turn negative emotions into positive emotions by various using various tools such as mediation, prayer, affirmations, and visualization, etc. And allow yourself to feel happy for others for what they have that you don’t. Use their achievements as a source of inspiration for yourself.
6. Express Gratitude for What You Have
People who are thankful for what they have are better able to cope with stress, have more positive emotions, and are better able to reach their goals. The best way to harness the positive power of gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal or list, or vocally speak the words aloud. When you actively write exactly what you are grateful for each day, you create conditions for even more things to come into your life that you will be grateful for. Doing so has been linked to happier moods, greater optimism and even better physical health and more blessings to flow.
7. Dream Big
Go ahead and dream big, as you’ll be more likely to accomplish your goals. Rather than limiting yourself, when you dream big you are opening your mind to a more optimistic, positive state, where you have the power to achieve virtually anything you desire.
8. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
If the issues you are mad about will be irrelevant a year, a month, a week or even a day from now, why sweat it? Happy people know how to let life’s irritations roll of their back.
9. Avoid Making Excuses
It’s easy to blame others for life’s failures, but doing so means you are unlikely to rise past them. Happy people take responsibility for their mistakes and missteps, then use the failure as an opportunity to change for the better. If you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
10. Live in the Present
Allow yourself to be immersed in whatever you are doing right now, and take time to really be in the present moment. Avoid replaying past negative events in your head, or worrying about the future, just savor what’s going on in your life right now.
11. Wake up at the Same Time Every Morning
Getting up at the same time every day (preferably at sunrise) is deceptively simple. Doing so will help to regulate your circadian rhythm so you’ll have an easier time waking and likely feel more energized. Plus, the habit of rising early every day is one shared by many successful people, as it enhances your productivity and focus.
12. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Your life is unique, so don’t measure your own worth by comparing yourself to others. Even regarding yourself as better than others is detrimental to your happiness, as you are fostering judgmental feelings and an unhappy sense of superiority. Measure you own success based on your progress alone, and not that of others.
13. Surround Yourself with Positive People
The saying “misery loves company” is entirely true. That’s why you need to choose friends who are happy and optimistic themselves, as you will be surrounded by positive energy.
14. Realize that You Don’t Need Others’ Approval
It’s important to follow your own dreams and desires without letting naysayers stand in the way. It’s fine to get others’ opinions, but happy people stay true to their own hearts and don’t get bogged down with the need for outside approval.
15. Take Time to Listen
Listening helps you soak up the wisdom of others and allows you to quiet your own mind at the same time. Intense listening can help you feel content while helping you gain a different perspective. ‘Knowledge speaks—but wisdom listens.’
16. Nurture Social Relationships
Positive social relationships are a key to happiness, so be sure you make time to visit with family, friends and other significant people in your life.
17. Meditate
Meditation helps you keep your mind focused, calms your nerves and supports inner peace. Research shows that it can even lead to physical changes in your brain that make you happier.
18. Eat Well
What you eat directly impacts your mood and energy levels in both short and long term. Whereas eating right can prime your body and brain to be in sync and in a focused, happy state. Eating processed junk food will leave you sluggish and prone to chronic disease. Low concentrations of omega-3 fats EPA and DHA are known to increase your risk of mood disorders.
19. Exercise
Exercise boosts levels of health-promoting brain chemicals like serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine, which may help buffer some of the effects of stress and also relieve some symptoms of depression. Rather than viewing exercise as a medical tool to lose weight, prevent disease, and live longer—all benefits that occur later—try viewing (at least some light) exercise as a daily tool to immediately enhance your frame of mind, reduce stress and feel happier.
20. Proper Sleep and Sun Exposure
Sleep deprivation is linked to psychiatric disorders such as anxiety and bipolar depression. While getting sufficient sleep is linked to positive personality characteristics, such as optimism and greater self-esteem, as well as a greater ability to solve problems. Regular sun exposure is essential for vitamin D production, low levels of which are linked to depression. But even beyond vitamin D, regular sun exposure is known to enhance mood and energy through the release of endorphins.
21. Live Minimally
Clutter has a way of sucking the energy right out of you and replacing it with chaos. Clutter is an often unrecognized source of stress that promotes feelings of anxiety, frustration, distraction and even guilt. So give your home or office a clutter makeover, purging it of excess stuff and getting it in the right order. Clutter not only takes up space in your physical environment, but also in your mind.
22. Be Honest
Every time you lie, your stress levels are likely to increase and your self-esteem will crumble just a little bit more. Plus, if others find out you are a liar it will damage your personal and professional relationships. Telling the truth, on the other hand, boosts your mental health and allows others to build trust in you. Not included are the occasional, often necessary and beneficial, “white lies.”
23. Establish Personal Control
Avoid letting other people dictate the way you live. Establish personal control in your life that allows you to fulfill your own goals and dreams, as well as have a great sense of self-esteem.
24. Accept what Cannot be Changed
Everything in your life is not going to be perfect, and that’s perfectly alright. Happy people learn to accept injustices and setbacks which they cannot change, and instead put their energy on changing what they can control for the better.
Lots of Love, Sage Crystal, ND
